Dreams of a Passionate Child

Time Traveling through Mush

2011-02-17T07:32:00.000-08:00

I'm in a courtyard, that is in the middle of someone's Frank Lloyd Wright looking home. Courtyard is old and ruined, lots of bricks laying around, old dead grass and dirt. In the middle of this is a large steam copper looking machine. About 8 feet long, 6 feet high. Wet, steaming and making a ton of machine noises.

There are about 6 or 7 people in their 20's standing in a group, watching this machine. In front of them is a tall man with a long purple button coat on, and a purple hat, explaining how this machine works.

He explains how this is a new device he created where people can travel through their subconscious into other time. As people are asking question, he is trying to simplify the answers by saying "There's no special tool or machine that is doing this - just a lot of necessary stimulant to the brain" and explains how dirt; being surrounded by earth, is the best way.

He opens the huge hatch on the top, and up comes a man that looks like Tom Hanks, and he is gasping for air. He has wires and electrodes all around his head, and throughout this body. He is deeply covered in a mushy dirt. The tall man pushes him back down into the mush, and says he needs to let him continue "through his journey". How the guy is breathing in there, I don't know.

But he lies back down, and on a monitor outside the steam engine machine is a bunch of electric lines pulsating around in circles, moving forward, as if the monitor itself is going through time with him. The man continues to explain how the brain is the key.

As the day turns into night, people are sleeping on the ground, whispering to each other, talking about this whole thing. The machine is still going. One guy says "this is nuts, I want to see him" so he starts to open the hatch and everyone else is going "wait, dont open it". So he opens it, looks at the guy still in the dirt, alive, wires all around him, breathing heavily. He watches him for a moment and then pokes him. No response. He looks around the tank and sees a clear liquid in a tube, sitting along side one of the monitors. He takes it and shuts the tank back up. He walks over to a part of courtyard, and everyone tells him to put it back. He opens the tube and thinks that if he drinks it, he'll be able to go through time. So he drinks it.

The tall man suddenly arrives and looks at him, as the guy with the tube falls to the ground and start shivering all over. He sighs and says "ok, we need to get him into the tank. someone help me" and then the rest of the people start to help him get the guy ready.

That was it~

Underground Room with Time Machine Windows

2010-12-29T07:01:00.000-08:00

More dreams about degradation again. This time, a bunch of people in an underground warehouse that is completely empty. Everyone lined up like they're in the Army. Facing forward, to these two people who are telling them to do very strange things - I can't remember the details but it was pretty bad.

One thing I do remember is not only the commands of actions under penalty of death, but how they would tease people by taking them over to a window which showed their future. It was a window of pain, I would call it. They would look at the window, and the window showed them their most happy moments. Whether it was a husband or wife, or a family, or some event that they remembered. They would show them happiness, and then force them to go back into the line of people.

Now that I think about it, that would be true torture. Because, when you're being tortured, I image that you eventually just turn off your brain. You don't want to feel or think about anything anymore. But when they force you to see something that stimulates your feelings of hope and happiness...then the torture really does become real. They are not allowing you to escape from it, in that way.

I think there is a lot of symbolism in this one for me, where this kind of torture can happen to one individual from another. Someone promises happiness and then they disappoint you on purpose; there are all sorts of examples I could write about. I went through that, but have not really accepted it fully. It could be why these dreams come out in the most oddest ways.

One part of the dream was where a bunch of tall blond women athletes came in, and started playing cricket. Go figure.

More Nightmares

2010-12-12T06:48:00.000-08:00

More dreams - and more nightmares. It's been a while since I've had nightmares one after the other. Last night again, I had a few of them.

One was me moving from house to house in different cities, lost, and constantly running into Adam (the ex) with each driveway I would pull into. I couldn't seem to get away from him.

Another dream was me swimming in the backyard of this beautiful house and the area was covered with beautiful flowers, roses, tulips; it was a Secret Garden. While I was swimming in a pool, Adam shows up and asks me to go to the store with him. I ignored him and then he disappeared in his car.

Another dream was me seeing his car in a parking lot with a friend of mine, and we both panicked. It was at a restaurant that both of us were going to eat at, but my friend insisted we go in. So I did, and there in the waiting area was him and a girl sitting together. I ran into the bathroom and hid for a moment. Then I went back out and he wasn't there but the girl was there sitting alone.

Another dream was me driving down several highways and I kept seeing his car at every turn; I wasn't able to get away from it.

The final one was me going to his house and every time I went in, he was telling me how this girl he was with was someone he was going to stay with unless I came back to him. I remember feeling a lot of pain and then every time I saw her I had feelings of anger; convinced she was in on all this. I had feelings of sadness and pity as well. I had a lot of different feelings. And the more he showed up to tell me about what I was missing out on, the more I kept trying to get away. But no matter where I went, him and the girl were there. Him psychology trying to get me back, and the girl sitting there, looking smug.

When I thought about him and girl together, and the fact that she will most likely be with him for the rest of his life (especially if she hasn't left by now-fellow psychopath victims will relate to this) I felt so much pain. Not just the feeling in me, but for her. And for what he will be doing to her. And how there is no one to stop it. How she will be drained, just like I was. Fed off for years, like a vampire, and then only when she dares to question being sucked dry does she get pushed back down even further into the floor. It was like watching evil happen in front of me and I was helpless.

Dreams like this often happen with stress; it's been a stressful time lately so I'm not surprised these keep happening. Hopefully the next dream will be more positive.

Chained in Luxury

2010-12-11T18:57:00.000-08:00

I usually don't write about nightmares, but let's look at it as more of a surreal dream than an actual nightmare. Plus, when I speak with people about nightmares its more so I can get it out of my system. No one is really around tonight for me to speak with, so, here I am. Writing again.

I pretty much know what this one symbolizes but nevertheless, it's not pleasant to be reminded of painful past relationships.

It began with an ex of mine (for now, let's call him Adam). Details are already starting to fade so what I remember now is me walking through a room in an old attic. In the room was one window only. There was an old bed in the middle of the room, with white bedsheets, which were obviously used because the bed was a mess. I was with some older couple that told me they had kicked Adam out of the place because he was using it to bring women there.

Suddenly, everything changed. I was part of a small group of 6 people. We were kidnapped by these rich people. I was in a large mansion, tied in chains. We were being punished for some reason but it wasn't clear why.

We were being tortured in very weird ways. An example would be, a very nice old lady would come to me and tell me "now this won't hurt very long" and she took this screw and a hammer, and put it on top of my head. She told me "it will be just a second of pain and then its over". She hammered the screw into my skull. Once it was in, she took a chain and hung it from the screw, and at the other end, made sure the chain was connected to the wall. She goes "There we go!" with a big smile, and then proceeds to do this to the rest of the 5 people/vampires that were there with me. Keep in mind, we all looked like regular people. I was in regular clothes; pants and a sweater.

Next, a guy came in and said "ok, we're all going to play a game here" and he told us to walk towards the middle of the room from the wall we were attached to. I could only walk so far because the chain was stuck to my head from the screw it was connected to. So we all made our way to the middle of the room, and then had to stop. He kept reminding us to be careful, and keep in mind that we were connected to the wall.

In front of us each was a door but it was a door with a mirror on it. I tried to open the handle, but the person told us that if we opened the door, it would tear off a piece of our skin. Apparently the handle was rigged to something else, that would somehow, hurt us. Anyone who refused to do it was told they would hurt us even more. Of course, they were extremely polite, and very nice.

I started to open the door, but could feel a part of my body hurting from doing so. The man says "You can do it!" I started to cry and said " its painful" and he pats me on the back. "I know, " he says. "But you have to choose one way or the other. Don't worry, I'll be right here as it happens."

Desert Planet

2010-11-04T17:14:00.000-07:00

Well the dreams have started up again - with a vengeance. So here's one I just had an hour ago, and I only fell asleep for 45 minutes.

I was on another planet. The planet was made of nothing but desert sand. There were hills everywhere but it was all sand. Now, I'm standing there with a group of mountain hikers and they are deciding which way we should go. I see a small little wood outhouse just sitting in the middle of the sand somewhere. I figure I should use the bathroom. I walk over to it, and open the door.

As soon as I go in, I see the toilet but next to it are a ton of clothes with hangers, like I walked into someones clothing closet. As I'm looking at the skirts, my cell phone on me rings. At first, I'm confused. How could I get a signal here on another planet? So I answer. It's some guy I do not know going, "So, how are you" and I say "uh, fine."

Then some woman from the mountain hikers comes in, and goes to the bathroom. I bend down and hide behind a bunch of clothes hanging from this pole; meanwhile the guy on the phone keeps talking and asking me a bunch of provocative questions. I say "I can't talk right now" and then I hang up.

As soon as the women leaves, I see another way to get out of this little hut from the bottom of a wall, there's an opening. Instead of using the front door, I force myself through this small hole in the wood, out onto the sand. As I collapse on the sand, I see a large flying bird the size of a dinosaur slowly making it's way down to land. It lands about 100 feet from me, and begins to roost there, just sitting and making squawking noises.

Britain and Evil Grass

2010-09-12T07:43:00.000-07:00

A very dreamy dream.

Started with me being invited across the street to a large mansion that was practically empty. I was in heaven by doing that, as I love empty places, especially when they are enormous.

I was obviously in Britian, since when I went in, there was Neil Tennant of the PSB who told me to make myself at home. It was obviously his place. (no idea why he was brought into the dream, I haven't listened to them in days).

I walked through so many hallways. I went for walks outside in the garden. The garden was also, enormous. I almost felt like I was dreaming while I was walking. It was the most content feeling, and yet I had a feeling of intense longing to stay there; to live in this garden and this quiet house. I wanted to live for the rest of my life in this place, where it was quiet and beautiful. I did not want to leave.

Neil poked his head out, and said we had to have lunch with some people. I walked with him along another hallway and we sat down at a table and had lunch.

At some point, I was talking with a Britsh gentleman who ended up walking with me down some attic in the house, looking out the windows. I started talking to him about my favorite Werner Herzog movie, Nosferatu. And how the character of the vampire is one of the first sympathetic characters in cinema, and how him and the female flirt with each other, and then suddenly, I make up a scene in my head to tell him (that doesn't even exist in the movie). I tell him that makes a move on him but he doesn't want to follow through with it. And how she leans up against him, asking him if she can borrow some change. He says yes and he puts his hand in his pocket, and digs down for money, all the while looking at him. There is a moment of tension and he calmly says "There's nothing there." She pulls her hand out and looks at him - and then I explain this scene to the man and he just looks at me in confusion.

Then I am walking downtown, in a small city, looking for a restuarant that I am supposed to meet Neil at. I get lost in this loud city, and end up in surburbia, among houses and quiet streets; I can hear birds chirping and kids playing somewhere.

I start to feel intense longing. Wish I could be back in that house where I was so content and angry at myself for ever leaving.

I somehow, end up on a skateboard.

I end up trying to skate myself up this large hill of dirt, and when I reached the top, I fall over towards the other side where there is no hill. I hit the ground hard.

I call a lady on my cell phone asking her where Neil's house is and she start telling me what streets to go to, etc. I end up in a back alley where there is this large patch of grass that hasn't looked like its been watered in days. I start to walk across it and then I trip and fall. Instantly, the grass grabs my purse and starts to ravage it. Confused, I get up and get off the grass immediately. Apparently the grass is looking for any human thing to grab so it can survive. It finds nothing in my purse and leaves it there, torn apart.

Then, my cats pop out of my purse and meow for help.

So I run back on the grass, shoes on, tell the cats to stay, but Milhouse doesnt listen and jumps out of the purse towards me. As he walks, the grass begins to feed on his feet. He is meowing and scared, and I quickly grab him and get off the patch.

All the time while this is happening, I miss the calmness and quietness of the house. I am wanting so much to get back. To communicate my longings with Neil, with that other man, and whomever else is around.

Woke up wishing I were in a large empty house in Britain.

Stories Through Music

2010-06-27T12:32:00.000-07:00

I haven't expressed myself in months, creatively. I have no idea if anyone besides my mother and a couple friends read my posts anyway - so the following may not make much sense. If it sounds complicated, I certainly don't want to waste any one's time on the weekend. Just delete and go on to the next message.

Emails off, phone off. Today is my day to write. Even though this isn't a dream, it is however, the stuff dreams are made out of. And today is about Ulrich's live performance. For those who know his music, you always know the titles of these pieces that he plays - but as I've said before, titles mean nothing to me. Its the feeling that I myself get, from the music. Just because something may be labeled "venice beach" from some band doesn't mean that's what it is about. As I grew up listening to classical pieces that were labeled strictly as "minuet in G flat" etc for this sense, I still believe that.

I listen to Ulrich's Live Performance a few times a week. He performed this in 2009 and I sometimes share it on Facebook, though no one listens. Regardless, I'm always analyzing the feel and emotion from each of his pieces - 'tis my nature. Plus its symbolic for whom I am on the inside and the type of mindset I often can be in. I know that I am not understood. I know that I am not seen as who I truly am; I mean, who is? Can we truly know someone completely? I don't even think we are meant to.

However, here are my thoughts on his performance, block by block. Feel free to just scan through this: the emotions and thoughts might be fun.

~~~~~~~~

Minute 1:45-5:20 - "Home"

This piece is warm. Comforting. I feel as if I am snuggled up under many warm blankets, near a fire while snow is silently falling outside. I feel as if I am in a cottage somewhere, away from everything, looking at someone I love peacefully.

Minute 5:30-7:45 - "Indulgence"

There is something so decadent and delicious about this. I feel as if I'm floating on air, falling gently into our most wanted indulgence that we have on the inside. Its a beautiful feeling, as all of these pieces are.

Minute 8:30-11:20 - "Isolation"

Innerness. An isolated beauty. On top of a mountain at dawn. No one for miles, the sound of wind and you are there with you and you only.

Minute 11:30-13:15 - "Delirium"

Dizziness. Insanity. Delirious realization of something that makes us turn cartwheels on the inside. Holding back but fighting to keep it from exploding out.

Minute 13:35-19:50 - "Intensity"

A groove, an excitement, racing, speeding, a rawness, a strength that comes out of us at the most unforeseen times. Usually seen in the young, always there in the old.

Minute 25:00-31:10 - "Awe"

Standing in a temple, staring up at the ceiling. Looking at someone we love as they accomplish something amazing. Being silent as someone speaks, filling our hearts with knowledge, and our minds with barriers. The wind giving birth to a tree branch moving. Looking up at the sky, and witnessing a cloud go over the sun, and watching it change the entire shadow upon the landscape. The ocean waves, living a life, each crash at a time.

Minute 31:40-37:00 - "Reaching"

Yearning for understanding. Holding our head down while holding our hands out towards the sky. Longing for one touch, hoping for one acknowledgement. Attaching ourselves to the painful denial of change.

Minute 38:00-42:30 - "Forgiveness"

Delicate love, blissful wave of reliefs, and letting go. Letting go, is one of the most powerful emotions one can express and feel. The action of letting go and forgiving, opens up a million more doors when one thought they were all closed.

Minute 43:00 - 46:33 - "Acceptance"

Through acceptance, we learn. Through acceptance, we being stronger. We are finally able to see clearly. This is, by itself, something that has no words.

Minute 47:00-51:00- "Happiness"

Celebration time. Dancing. In love. Laughing. Covering a smile and then letting it go. Looking into their eyes and seeing bliss. A deep connection. Victory. Sharing. The beauty of communication. The beauty of a human being.

(Minute 51:50-1:00:15 - "Vengeance")

(Revenge? Anger? or Passion? Lust, perhaps? There's something primal about this. Either way, I'd hate to be on the receiving end of this feeling. True fans know what the title of this song is, so that explains it all, however, I think its pretty symbolic of how powerful our negative, pointless, wastes of unproductive emotions can become. Easily overtaken - easily believed - easily, we make it a law. )

~~~~~~

Besides the last piece -Usually when I listen to this entire performance, it's almost a kind of cleanliness for me, cleaning out all of the emotions and chaos that I've gone through. When I listen, I go through all of these emotions and feel relaxed and comfortable after hearing it -like I've done a daily exercise, or a Zen like meditation. Honestly, I usually end it after hearing the "Happiness" piece, because then it gets so intense and crazy with that last one, its doesn't put me in a relaxed state at all - however it still is beautiful. But besides that last one, the entire performance has a living story to it. A life being born, a story being told to us. This is why I'm very happy he agreed to be my composer for my first feature film, and this is why I'm happy that I discovered him; for he brings out in me, a reminder of the beauty that others have, and that I have inside me.

The beauty of being alive. :)

http://soundcloud.com/astrangelyisolatedplace/ulrich-schnauss-audioriver-2009-promo

Hello and Transform

2010-06-09T08:37:00.000-07:00

Its a night, in a suburban neighborhood and I'm walking through blocks of houses, lots of trees, your standard family street. Its midnight, and its quiet and windy and cold. I'm apparently to meet someone somewhere. I come to their house, and there are tons of kids in their 20s partying in some house with loud music. A bunch of people are standing on the corner of the street, smoking and talking loudly. I walk over to them and they all say hello and introduce themselves. Meanwhile I'm rubbing at some open sore on my face that seems itchy. A guy comes out of the mess of people, has glasses and dark hair. I realize he's the person I'm supposed to meet and I walk to him. He says hello and he smiles, and before we can start talking, it gets louder and more obnoxious. I realize I'm with a bunch of young party goers and I decide, "the hell with this" and leave.

I keep walking down the streets for a while, and then I suddenly crouch down behind someone's car in their driveway. The sore on my face becomes wider and one large eye comes from it. I reduce in size in this small green fat body. So I'm this little short green thing running around with one large eye. Except I'm seeing everything from its point of view, like a cam shot in a movie.

I'm running along the streets fast, and a bear comes out from someone's backyard and growls at me...I keep running. Then I see a cat and it ignores me. Then a dog sees me and starts to run after me. I run even faster and I lose it somehow. All this is happening in the middle of the night among a bunch of people's houses. I stop and see a pack of wolves looking at me from someone's living room window. They somehow get out and come up to me. I make some high nervous noise and they start barking. I run off.

Space Ships and Memories

2010-05-01T07:26:00.000-07:00

Everyone on earth heard a spaceship was going to land, to have us come aboard and talk with us on a trip through space.
So me and 50 other people met in a big room, around a large white 70's looking porcelain table. Each one of us stood up and talked about why we should be going and what we should or shouldn't talk about. One of the people who stood up was actor Victor French, Mr Edwards from Little House on the Prairie. He stood up in his usual plaid shirt and suspenders, and we listened to his idea.
Suddenly I was on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere, completely alone with a bag, waiting for a bus. A city bus came that decided to stop 100 feet from where I was, so I ran towards it. I got on just in time and the bus kept driving in the middle of nowhere, in this country fields surrounding the roads that just kept going on and on.
Suddenly I'm back in the large room, and back talking with all the people about the spaceship that is going to land soon.
The spaceship lands, and is this stainless steel oval looking thing that is the size of a football stadium. We all get on it. The head alien starts talking to us about how he can help us remember things. As the ship takes off, I look out the windows and see we are flying through space, so its completely dark in there.
The ship has lots and lots of narrow hallways that all have windows that let you look out. So that means, surrounding the ship is a narrow hallway that goes around the entire ship. In order to get out of that hallway, you cut across to another hallway that is another layer of the ship - basically the ship was a labyrinth.
I walked down these walkways, and saw lots of things - people seeing in front of them things that happened in their childhood, people eating dinner, people looking out the windows; it was like a cruise adventure, people all over the place doing things. And the aliens were here and there, walking in between everyone, and helping them out when they had a question.
At one point, I sat on a small couch that was part of a wooden wall, and stared across the walkway through the large window that I saw all sorts of stars and galaxies. And alien came by and sat next to me and I asked him to help me remember. "Remember what" it says. I point to a guy standing several feet down, who is eating and I say "I remember what he did to me." Suddenly, I remember and I'm back in college.
I'm in college, in Oregon at Mount Hood Community College getting my A.A. degree before I take off for film school. Suddenly the music for "Bluebird of Happiness" by Ulrich Schnauss starts playing in my head; especially the quiet beginning. A boy I loved for a long time, walks up to me. Meanwhile, I'm hearing the lyrics "The love in your eyes will get you so far, Gotta find a way back home....gotta find a way back home..." and I stand there while the boy comes up to me. I tell him that he hurt me tremendously and I cant believe he didn't tell me he involved with someone else. He tells me I'm overreacting. He gives me a hug, smiles, laughs and starts to walk away.
As he walks away, he is defensive and beings to tell me that I am too emotional, taking this all the wrong way, that I am awful, etc. "...Never wanted to feel this way..." starts playing from the same song in the background; I am standing there watching him walk off and then he disappears.
I am suddenly back in the spaceship, sitting next to the alien, back on the couch - I turn to him and am crying and say "make him remember". The alien says "What is the good of making another one suffer for your pain". I get up and walk by the boy who is eating dinner there and he waves at me. The alien gives him some kind of helmet and the boy starts remembering what he did. He starts crying.
The alien looks at me. Then it walks away.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LGfY0YGlkA - Bluebird of Happiness

Oversized Garden Vines

2010-04-28T07:32:00.000-07:00

I lived with my mother and father on this large plantation of land, but it was covered with vegetables and flowers. Just hundreds of feet you could walk along these lines of flowers and vegetables growing systematically; each in its own block of earth.
So I'm home one day, and I take it upon myself to mow the lawn, which is in front of the house - its just a small patch. I go out there and there are vines covering the grass, everywhere. They seem to be coming from the patches of flowers and vegetables surrounding the house. So my mother comes out and walks me down around the land, and is pointing out, that the overgrown weeds (which look like vines) are so out of control, that they have taken over the patches. So it would look like, a large thick vine covering a bunch of other small weeds. In fact, the vines were so big that they were taller than us, and were bent over - almost quivering.
She got under one of them, to feel around, and I was going "uh you sure you want to do that" but she kept going. I hear her say underneath there "Well, this is interesting." I go "What?" She says "There are all male vines but no female ones - I wonder why they are still growing." Suddenly I panic, worried that the vines might take us because we are female, and I pull my mother out and go "lets get out of here".
We keep walking, and then suddenly come across a baseball field across the street, with families and kids sitting on blankets, eating picnics and playing ball. Apparently this whole time I had a mower in my hand, so one of them yells "Don't mow today!" I say "I'm not! Don't worry!"
We keep walking and we come across an outdoor public pool, my mother says "i didn't know they had a pool in this park' and I decide to jump in at the deep end, which is only 4 feet deep. Must have been a kids pool. I then realize its all dirty at the bottom, and the color is kinda green, so I decide to get back out.

Bookstore Dungeon

2010-04-26T17:44:00.000-07:00

All I remember now, is that I was with someone in a bookstore, and we were trying to find where all the children's books are. I wanted to find a rare children's book, something like "Horton Hears a Who" or something like that. We looked through all these old, dusty books everywhere, that were in no order whatsoever. They were stacked on top of each other. So I went up to some guy and asked where the rare books where - he pointed to this woman and said it was "through her mouth".
So she opened her mouth, real wide, to the point of it so wide that a human body could fit through there - it basically became a tunnel. I looked in her mouth and said "I can't fit in there" and I was scared to death because it was all dark and red.
So my friend jumps right in and I hear him slide through this long tunnel and land somewhere. I put half of my body in and yelled "I'm not going to fit" and tried to get out. She closed up her mouth and said I could take the stairs.
So I took these long flights of stairs, down to a dark basement with all these people sitting against a wall, handcuffed. A woman had a whip, as she walked back and forth in front of them, telling them the rules on that we could look at the books, but couldn't touch them.

Reminded me of "Nightmare on Elm Street Dream Warriors" movie, where Freddy opens his mouth so wide that a person could fit through it.

Claudia and Talking Animals

2010-04-08T07:57:00.000-07:00

First of all, it started about a coworker named Claudia that I knew years ago that I rarely talk to anymore except on Facebook. And she was the lead role in this one, so where she came from in my brain, I have no idea.
Its starting to fade so I need to type fast: She was alone near a fountain outside this university setting, with a baby in her arms. I came up to talk to her and she didn't like me at all, apparently in this dream she had known me for years. And she was upset that I was coming up to talk to her. On the side of this, I was being chased by some bad guy, or monster, or some hairy situation that I was in the middle of; so I begged her to come with me for her own safety. She said no.
I run back into the university, and I bump into 4 types of animals, one is a tiny black toy dog, another is a tiny bird, and two other small animals that talked English. I said to them, Quick, follow me! And we all go up the stairs to the 4th floor, where my room is number 416.
I run up the stairs, I try to open my door and it wont open because its full of people. Now, one of the people in there is another person that I dont talk to much except on Facebook, but she is a close friends of the first one. As soon as I get in, she starts telling me how I should have told the girl outside how I felt. I said "I can't get my heart broken twice in one day." (whatever that means)
I look out the door, peeking my head into the hallway. The animals are walking slowly, making their way down the long hall towards me. I'm going "hurry up!" Suddenly this bad guy/evil force/bad situation seems to be a threat again, and I shove the animals in the room and close the door. Suddenly, the girl is in there as well with a ton of people, and she in the corner of the room, holding her baby close to her, while everyone is talking all at once. I make my way over to her and I hold her and say its going to be alright. She's nice to me and we hold each other; all is forgiven.
All at once, I'm in a diner in the middle of nowhere, some country diner with the sun coming up through the windows. I'm ordering some menu item with just an egg and one cut of toast. I get up and go through those floppy kitchen doors and I'm back in the University hallway again.
I walk through the hallway and see an opening in the wall, with a large something covered in bubbble wrap, about the size of a painting. I pick it up and start to continue to wrap it.
My mother comes out of nowhere, complaining that it was inconvenient for her brother to drop this present off for her to wrap. I explain how I will help her wrap it. Meanwhile, I'm hurrying so I can get back to the University room, and check on everyone.

Doobie Brothers and Balloons

2010-03-11T09:18:00.000-08:00

I was in the middle of nowhere (These dreams tend to start that way) in a field with wheat grass and it was a hot day. I come upon a mansion, but also it was sort of a hippish looking house. Apparently the Doobie Brothers lived here and they invited me in.
It was all 70's decor when I came in, and they showed me to their private recording studio in the bottom on the place, a small room, walls covered with soundproof material, and they started playing for me a different version of "It Keeps You Running" which was better than their original. For some reason it was a slower piece of music. They said that they preferred this version but the studios insisted they use the one that is played on the radios. I seemed to like this one better.
Then they showed me to this really huge room on the top of the house, covered in all windows, even the walkway was glass. So I'm walking out to this, and its looking all over the valley or the mountains, wherever this way. And there's some beauty contest happening in this little room between three girls, being judged by these guys.
Afterwards, the women follow the guys into this den that has wood paneling and orange little beds and they start trying to have sex with these women, by putting balloons between their legs(?) I didnt understand how that was possible, but they kept trying. Whatever.
All of the sudden I had to look for my cats. I saw Milhouse peeking his little head in and I follow him down some stairs covered with carpet. Him and Dorie are there, waiting for me to take them home. I chase them all over and finally I pick them up and go back out to my car.
I call Michael and tell him sorry I'm late and I'm on my way over. With the cats in the car. I'm driving out of a dirt driveway, with this house behind me in the distance.

I Spent the Night with Hell Boy

2009-11-07T09:25:00.001-08:00

What a strange dream, and I don't even like the Hell Boy movies. All I remember is me in some busy downtown area, trying to save the world with him somehow. At some point we were underground, in a tunnel, and he was trying to take a shower and I had to hold him down and scrub his head with soap. He was complaining the whole time. He's naked of course, so we start making out.

Then a bunch of bad guys show up, they shoot him and he falls. Of course, suddenly his clothes and outfit is back on. I start crying and start running through all sorts of other hallways with glass doors on the side, some of them with doctors names on them. Then I went back to him, and the bad guys are going to shoot him while he's there on the floor. I throw myself upon him and beg that they not kill him. I look at Hell Boy and he opens one of his eyes, winks at me and whispers 'trust me, baby' and gets up, whipping out his huge guns and blowing them all to kingdom come~ then I start arguing with him about how many people he's killed. He tries to smooch me again but suddenly we get more bad news from someone saying someone else is in peril and we need the money to save them.

Suddenly, I'm in an elevator going up towards the main street of downtown, and I step out on the street and have to run across traffic to go into someone's office to grab a large check that needs to be deposited immediately. I grab it after convincing several receptionists that I need to go in there, and I see the check is for $7558 dollars and .00 cents. I run back to the elevator across the street, get in a warehouse elevators and see there are two cars in it as well. One of them is mine.

The elevator goes down to the tunnel, the door opens and there is Hell Boy, holding a bunch of documents in one hand, and shooting away bad guys with another, while he is on a rickety bridge between two underground cliffs over molten lava. I start screaming for him because I don't want him to fall.

Thats about it.

Abandoned Business Park at Night

2009-09-14T09:22:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure where my brain was last night, but I swear I didn't watch any weird or odd movies the night before. I think I'm just naturally weird. I embrace the unusual. Apparently.
Details of the dream as starting to fade, so I'm going to try my best to remember.
~~~
A group of school kids, taken on a field trip up a big mountain and they unload the kids into this abandoned business park. Lots of business building, and a concrete walkway right in the middle but no one around. The kids are running around and everything, checking things out. Then some counselor says "when the sun goes down, whatever you do, don't be on the grass" and of course, the sun starts setting. As the sun is setting, all these disgusting slimy creatures start coming out of the ground. First their heads pop out, and they look like big bulging rocks from the earth. Then they push themselves out of the ground and they are these vampire bodies running around the place, grabbing the kids and eating them, sucking on their blood, ravaging, etc.
At one point I seemed to be one of the kids, because a woman comes up to me, all nice and sweet. She goes "come here my darling" and I start backing off. She reaches her hand out to me and says "i want to touch you", her hands starts to go towards my legs and I scream. She grabs me and feels my thigh, and her touch starts to melt my leg off.
As I'm melting from what seems to be an acid like texture dripping from these beasts, the sun starts coming back up. The kids that haven't been attacked run into the field trip bus. These creatures start panicking because of the upcoming sun, and so they grab all the remaining kids, and go underneath the ground with them, and go to sleep as the sun is up.
So meanwhile as these things are sleeping - me and some other kids, are wide awake. Under the ground, in total darkness. We see and feel nothing but dirt. We start trying to move out of these creatures arms (they are holding us like babies) and we start whispering to each other on how do we get out of here. Someone finds a doorway the side of a suitcase and we start trying to pull ourselves out of there, even with our bodies all ruined.
We make it outside, crawling in this abandoned business park, along the concrete under a hot sun. We are making our way through the place and then of course the sun starts to set. (short days!)
These things start to come out from under the ground again, and somehow we are hiding from them under the ground. Some are behind the glass doors of the abandoned business centers, hiding and hoping they dont get discovered. Some kids are still in the hands of these monsters, but they must have been converted somehow because they all seem to get along together fine = meaning, they are not being attacked anymore.

I know there was more to this dream, but its gone now.

White Coral and Relatives

2009-07-06T10:22:00.000-07:00

Driving in the middle of nowhere. Ended up at an ocean. Two hotels near it. One extravagant looking one that is incredibly tall and unfriendly looking; another that is a single floor tiny guest house. I go to the tiny guest house and there is a front desk clerk who is a woman that is incredibly bitchy. I tell her I want room "24" but only for three nights. Then, to complicate things, I tell her that I don't want the room until the next night, because I'm waiting on my significant other. I guess I'll sleep in the car until he gets here.

So she gets mad and says that she won't know until I decide to actually check in and that they don't do reservations. Her assistant, a nice guy whispers to me that "dont worry, the guy in room 24 is checking out tomorrow anyway." She gets mad at him, and I walk out, waving goodbye.

I stand in between the two hotels, looking at the ocean. I decide to walk over the other tall grandiose hotel and ask the clerk if I can see some pictures of the rooms. He shows me a book of pictures, and I flip through them. Some of them have pictures of their huge ballroom. Their ballroom is covered in coral reef that is blue and lit up with a black light. In the middle of the floor of the ballroom is a huge white coral statue of Poseidon, holding a mortal woman. I'm looking at these pictures and I decide to stay in one of their rooms for the night, while waiting for my friend.

So they check me into a tiny room that looks like a ships cabin on the top floor of this huge building. Huge bed, tiny windows that overlook the ocean. Its incredibly dark and overcast. I'm walking around the room, checking it out. I look at the windows and see that the waves outside have gotten so high, that they are lapping against the windows. (Keep in mind, this room is at least 50 floors up.) I'm all excited and happy to be seeing the hotel covered in ocean waves. I call my friend and am crying, going "I wish you were here to see this beauty with me."

The next morning I check into the guest house that I originally wanted in the first place. The woman is nice this time. My friend calls and tell me that he can't make it, and I'm on my own. For some reason, I'm not surprised or bothered by this. I check in, and its a 70's looking hotel room with huge windows and glass walls that separate the rooms from the kitchen , the bathroom, etc. Suddenly, my relatives show up.

Its my aunt, my cousin Nathan, my cousin Dave and my cousin Tim. They decide to stay there with me. Everything is going fine, and suddenly my cousin Nathan starts acting like a brat and begins to throw temper tantrums on the floor, and is making everyone's life hell there. So I go outside to the night clerk, a nice young girl who tells me that I can put in him in a separate room they have there in the building. I drag him over there, and he's fighting me the entire time. I tell him to go to sleep (keep in mind, he's in his 20's while I'm doing this, a full grown person). He yells at me and says he wants to be part of things, etc. I go back into my area and everyone starts to see Nathan trying to open a door with this hands that is connected to our room. I go back to him, and decide to bring him back to the playroom that is separating the hotel room from his room - and everything is walled in glass. The playroom floor is covered in sand. Like an indoor beach.

I take him into this room, and I pass the band R.E.M. who is sitting there in this room on the floor. I tell them to keep it down while I'm doing this. Michael Stipes looks at his band and says "everyone got that?"and they nod.

I sit with Nathan, pull out a blanket and two play dolls. I go under the blanket with him and start acting out a story between these two dolls. The first doll is running around, with a deep voice, looking for underwater creative adventures. The second doll has a high voice, chasing after the first doll. The first doll finds some underwater plants with sparkling blue and silver strings, and starts pulling them out and swinging underwater with them. The second doll is telling the first doll to stop messing around. Meanwhile, Nathan is watching this and enjoying himself. My cousin David is smirking and being sarcastic, my cousin Tim is laughing and being upbeat and positive. The band and the relatives are watching from behind the glass, laughing.

Overcast Hick Towns and Balloons at PSB concert

2009-06-01T09:29:00.001-07:00

I had a dream about PSB last night. I was in some home in some hick town, and a bunch of family was coming over for some event. All of the sudden, Neil Tenant of PSB shows up. He’s all quiet and calm. So we put him up in a small guest room. Little do I realize that later, it’s a room full of all my PSB fan books and vinyls and posters of these guys. I was so embarrassed.
Then the rest of the dream is hazy but he did a concert that I helped him put on in this small town. It was overcast weather and cold. I remember them singing “building a wall” song, and there’s only about 500 people cheering in the way back of the arena. It felt like hardly anyone was there, but they didn’t seem to care. There were balloons and shirts being sold on the side of the stage. (Balloons? I don’t what that means at all.)
Then him and Chris Lowe, the other PSB guy, have to go back to England. So I’m taking them to the airport and we’re all laughing and getting along great. We start making up a song together in the car. He starts signing all of my fan stuff and putting them in a pile. I walk them to their gate and wave goodbye. Neil and Chris are all jolly and making jokes (as they do in real life) they wave back. For some reason they are boarding a train and I’m just waving happily, telling them to let me know that they’re home safe. I get a text from Neil hours later that they made it. That’s all I remember.

Brain Sucking Alien Red Strings

2009-04-30T06:23:00.000-07:00

I don't know how my mind was deciding on what direction to go last night, but I know it started with me in my old house as a 13 year old, lying in bed, petting my kitties and listening to music probably..suddenly I saw a very large grasshopper the size of my head crawling across my carpet with a miners hat on, and a red bright light attached to the hat.
He turned his head slowly to me, so that the red light panned its beam all over the room. I freaked and ran into my parents room and explained what I say, and they told me to go back to sleep.
The next day these weird stringy things were falling from the sky onto people's heads. They were red, veiny looking, and the size of long white onions. Whenever these things hit someone's head, the person immediately fell to the ground, shaking or convulsing, I dont know.
So here I am, running through town in the streets and there's chaos everywhere; people falling to the ground, screaming, feeling their heads in front of grocery stores. I'm having to dodge carts and vehicles driving out of control. Of course, some of these things would just land on the ground; never touching anyone. So you had to be careful you didn't step on them either, for fear of them attaching themselves to your foot.
It seemed to go to months later, where survivors were in a small house somewhere in the middle of nowhere, about 200 of us. Everyone is about to eat together and I go into the kitchen to see the guy who is cooking for everyone. I notice he has one of those things on his head. He looks up at me, and this creepy smile crawls across his face. I run into the living room, screaming "dont eat it! dont eat it! Its in the food!" (yeah, I know what this sounds like.)

Old China Markets and Cases of Money

2009-04-18T07:48:00.000-07:00

The dream started with me, being someone else. I was a man apparently, in his 20's, sitting on a ratted blanket in a corner of a street in old China, while people were selling food and other things around me.

There I was, against the wall, for some reason down on my luck and depressed. Someone comes up to me in an expensive black suit which stuck out from all the other people in the market. They acknowledged me and asked if I was available. I said I was. They asked me to kill someone for a lot of money. Suddenly, I turn into Jeremy Irons. I'm now standing up, looking at this Chinese business man, and writing down a number on a piece of paper. I write down $2500 for the kill, $1000 bonus afterwards. I'm paranoid that the business man will laugh and walk off, or worse, kill me. He takes the piece of paper and says he'll be in touch.

Its the next day. I'm the young man again in his 20's. I'm sleeping against the wall again, nothing to lose. I am awoken by a little old woman with black hair and huge eyes. She knocks me with her cane on the head. I wake up and ask what she wants. She goes "Would you be willing to kill someone else for me as well?"
I wake up panicked, and she's gone. I realize it was just a dream. (within the dream I am currently having). I then see a limo pull up and a man comes out, throws down the hugest briefcase I've ever seen. They drive off.

I open it, and inside is layers of metal shelves, each holding huge packets of money. All I can think of, is how am I going to get this back to the United States.
I start carrying it around town, and go through this dark walkway of tents. A small Chinese man bumps into me and asks me to follow him. He's bald, with no hair, looking like a monk out of Tibet. He takes me to a temple while I'm dragging this briefcase. He points to a statue. Apparently, I'm there to do whatever magic I'm capable of, to make it move, or come alive. And I have no idea how to do it.

Going Blank on Stage

2009-02-23T14:02:00.000-08:00

Odd dreams in the last few nights or so. I do remember one night vividly. I was in a crowd, watching my favorite band perform (PSB). I was in the front, moving along with the music. Then the lead singer, whom I worship, pulls me up on stage, and we start singing along together. Hah! What an indulgent fantasy.
He goes to the microphone and says 'this lady is going to sing our next piece for us!' and I was so excited. I got the microphone, sang the first two words of the song after the long electronic buildup...then went blank.
The music stopped, the audience went silent. I just stood there. "Um..." Then I say something stupid 'Guess I don't know this one!' and hand it over back to the lead singer, and trudge myself off stage.
I was so embarrassed. How could I forget that song? I NEVER forget their songs! I've been singing it since I was 16, what is my malfunction?
I woke up with the biggest feeling of humiliation.

I wonder what this all means.

Waterfalls and Dark Castles

2008-12-12T11:48:00.000-08:00

This was quite an interesting one, because I have had a recurring dream with this same castle over and over again. Each time, I have gone through different seasons of fields and snow and heat and mountains at night; only to reach this castle each time in my various dreams.

This time, I was driving during the day and it was overcast and cold. In a little European VW bug car. We drove through miles of green countryside and drove in front of this magnificent overbearing looking dark castle in the middle of nowhere.

We went up the driveway and I got out of the car. To the left of me was a small tiny building that looked like a temple, and I went inside. Suddenly I was surround by bright and shining gold, and as I walked in, there were hundreds of rich, elite people there holding a Jewish service and speaking in Hebrew together. I walked down the aisle and no one noticed me. I sat near the front and just looked around in awe at the historic artwork on the ceilings and around the gold walls. Since no one was speaking to me, I decided to quietly get out of there. I went out the back door and went back to the dark castle.

Ironically, the dark castle seemed more inviting than the temple. I so badly wanted to walk in, because it was obviously empty and no one was living there...that I knew of. Which is probably why I wanted to explore and see what or who I could find.

But I decided to explore the grounds. Instead of going through the front door, I saw a dark corner to the right. I went through it and started to crawl on my hands and knees through a hole in the ground.

When I came out I was in a large cave, surrounded by cold rock and glistening pools of moisture. There was a wall of water that was shimmering down on one side and falling gently across a bunch of rocks that had lights underneath them - so the water appeared as if was all lit up as it fell.

I think the cave was sort of my own temple; full of dark yet welcoming mysteries. Feeling more at one with myself, rather than being surrounded by people. And, water too, of course, since I think I must have been a water mammal in another life.

Milhouse Dream

2008-11-07T10:05:00.000-08:00

Why I’m even writing about this, I don’t know.

I guess because I need to get it out of my system.

I went to bed last night, filled with anxiety about my job, my film, finances and the future of my and my animals happiness. I’m sure this had a lot to do with the dream.

It took place at night, in the middle of a small town in the middle of nowhere (probably because I watched an episode of True Blood last night). I was at a small train station, and Milhouse was with me. Him and I were going to travel somewhere, but I have no idea where. Already I was stressed because I had Milhouse in a small crate cage, and he wasn’t liking it at all. He was very scared and not sure where I was taking him.

I stood in line at the train counter and asked if I could get a train car for just Milhouse and I, because if I were to sit in coach with him he’d be meowing his head off and disturbing others. If I had my own little compartment, I could let Milhouse out, and he could walk around, sniff things, and eventually, hopefully fall asleep.

Apparently I was given the best seat they had for this kind of situation, which was seat 6A, a tiny seat near a closet that I could adjoin to me. I stood in line to pay for it, and it came to $1800. I almost choked and paid it, just miserable.

Suddenly I remembered there was something I absolutely HAD to bring with me. I put millhouse down in the cage, looked at him and told him I would be back shortly. He watched me leave, meowing and all alone, surrounded by strange people and a busy environment. I ran out of the station, down the street, down the highway and was running through the streets of downtown for some reason. I was scared and wanting to get back to my Milhouse. I went into a building, grabbed whatever it was I needed (I can’t even remember) and then I ran all the way back to the station, hoping I didn’t miss the train.

I got back to the station, seeing the train pulling out and starting to go down the track.

I missed the train.

As it passed me, I saw a train car full of animals in cages stacked on top of each other. Milhouse was one of them.

I yelled and screamed for the train car to stop. I started running after it and screaming Milhouse’s name. Milhouse started meowing, along with the other animals barking and whining above him. I couldn’t find anyone to stop the train and there was no one to help me. I continued to run after it, hearing Milhouse meow for me. I stopped running, to watch the train totally disappear into the dark, and I had no idea where it was going. Milhouse was gone, and I had no clue what would happen to him anymore.

It was the worst dream I’ve ever had about my animals. Just writing it, makes me tear up. I have a passion for my little boy Millie. He and I are connected. If he were to disappear, I do not know how I could go on living. Not knowing how he was, not knowing if he was alone, hungry, taken away? Scared? Looking for me? And never finding me?

I can’t live like that.

When I awoke, I was in the worst fear. I looked down and saw Milhouse sleeping near my feet. I whispered his name and he got up, walked over to my pillow and curled up into a ball on the pillow. I whispered his name again and began to pet his soft coat of fur.

And Milhouse, being the cranky ball of fire he is, MARRWED harshly at me and his little paw bounced off my hand, as if saying “Awww come on, I’m sleeping!!"

No wonder little boys can't stand their moms giving them smooches at night.

Burnt Houses and Hopping Around The Universe

2008-10-21T07:01:00.000-07:00

It started with me in a burnt down house, yet the structure was still in tact. And I was so broke that I convinced the owner to let me and my two kitties live there. Ironically, there was a pool in the back that was in beautiful condition, and it even had a fountain that sprayed everywhere.
The house was a complete dump, and there was dirt and broken/burnt wood everywhere. I set up a Television, my couch, and my bed. Made sure I had a fridge in the burnt kitchen that worked, and that the toilet flushed. It was late at night, so i turned on a lamp I had. If one were to drive by, they'd see a woman sitting on a couch with a lamp, watching TV with two cats - and no walls.
It became the next morning and I was suddenly out on the back concrete porch, looking at the beautiful mansion-like pool. There were four people surrounding me, and singing Happy Birthday. I didn't know any of them, except one person who looked like a co-worker I bumped into weeks ago.
It began to rain and I went back inside, avoiding the drips from the holes in the burnt ceiling. I went to bed and pulled the covers over my head. Suddenly I heard a whirling noise, and got up to see what it was.
There was a hole in the floor. A large hole, and it was spinning.
Almost like a pool of oil that was going round and round until it created some kind of a vortex that went down into the ground forever. I just stared at it, not really believing what the heck was going on.

So, I jumped into it.

Went way down into the bottom of it, whirling around, and suddenly found myself thrown onto a grassy ground, surrounded by pink trees and a long bright path in front of me. I looked up and the circle I fell from closed up immediately.
Standing up, I felt like Alice in Wonderland. I walked down this path, passing all sorts of strange, quaint little houses that looked like they were made out of candy. Very colorful places, lots of colorful trees - almost like a Disney movie. I came across a tall woman, with long blond hair and a huge flowing white dress. Someone she told me I was on the planet Venus.
I kept walking and realized I was getting lost, surrounded by all these blissful blooming trees. I looked down and saw the vortex appear. I jumped in it and was thrown around again, until I was gently brought back into my room at the burnt house. I was exhilarated. I called a friend of mine and convinced them to come over. They walked through the place, laughing at the state of the house and then I showed them the moving circle in the ground. We both just stared at it.

High Ceilings and Waterfalls

2008-10-03T10:55:00.000-07:00

Apparently I was sitting in some large architectural neo-modern building that was completely empty. It had incredibly large ceilings that seemed to go on forever. The room I was in sitting in the middle of, seemed to go on and on for miles, without any end or wall in my sight. Just a large open space with walls on the side, but no end of it anywhere.
I was sitting on a white concrete stool. One of those things you might find in a garden. Behind me, was a quiet, large waterfall dropping all the way down from the top of the ceiling and falling gently behind me. I could hear the sound of water rushing down, but never hearing it hit the ground.
I was holding a pen and had a dark notebook in my lap, but I wasn't paying attention to that at all. All I was doing was continually staring up at the ceiling above me, and looking at the vast emptiness of it. Suddenly I heard an organ playing, echoing in the distance somewhere, with people's voices whispering over it. I remember not moving my head, but looking down with my eyes at the dark hallway that I could barely see miles away - way, way down in front of me. Sort of a dark spot in the middle of all these white walls. I strained to hear more of what might be going on.
Sitting there in the middle of the quiet, peaceful water falling, and hearing the gentle underground noise of an organ playing gently - I finally felt content and closed my eyes. I think I liked knowing I was there completely by myself - accepting and embracing the beauty that can come from being alone; that only you and yourself can experience. No one else. Because its the only time you feel fully understood. It's a great moment of fulfillment.
(http://ligamusic.com/Lyrics/2885092/Tomita/The_Ravel_album/Pavane_Pour_Une_Infante_Defunte/mp3/ )

Trailer Parks and Lifesize Talking Grasshoppers

2008-09-23T19:23:00.000-07:00

I remember the first dream I had when I was twelve. I remember waking up and going, boy - do I really dream like this?
So when I was twelve, I believe at the time, the song "Ghostbusters" was a hit. My dream began with a trailer in the middle of nowhere, in a large deep green field around 8pm at night. A couple were dancing in their trailer to this song. Slow dancing. The man seemed irritated at this, while the woman was smiling the whole time and happy she was enjoying herself and her husband.
Suddenly she hears a noise outside. She leaves the trailer, and walks out into the field in the dark. The music grows faint and it is suddenly silent. She is in total darkness. She sees a glow from beneath the ground, and bends down to look at it. The glow begins to pulsate. The glow is a bright green, flashing off and on. Fade to black.
10 years later.
The trailer park is gone, and on this ground that used to stand a grassy field, now stands a middle school. She is now a music teacher at this school, and is watching her class sing in the auditorium for hundreds of proud onlooking parents. She stands in the back of the rows, watching. She suddenly sees an open door in the corner of the room behind the stage where the kids are performing. She goes behind the stage and see the door, wide open, leading to darkness. She hesitates, not sure why she didn't see this door before. She walks through it, and into a void of black silence.
As her eyes get used to walking in blackness, she sees that she is walking down a long hallway. The hallway turns into a labyrinth, that begins to twist around. It is going further and further down, underneath the ground. She sees all sorts of old rustic black doors, all with locks on them. The walls around her are all black brick, with dirt and grime all over. No one has been down here for years, if ever. No human, that is.
She stops at an open door. Suddenly, she hears a shuffling from this empty dark room, and a grunting as some massive thing is moving. She stands there, not knowing what to do. From the darkness, comes a life size insect, looking almost like a grasshopper, wearing a black vest and hat. He stops and breathes raggedly. She stares back at him.
He looks at her. He bows like a gentleman, and takes off his hat. He stands back up straight, as she hears his wings shutter. She smiles.
"Welcome" he says.

An Empty Building and a Yearning Ulrich

2008-09-20T07:28:00.000-07:00

Music: Ulrich Schnauss "Einfeld"

All I can say is that it began with a large stone palace, that somehow turned to the color of ice. It was shiny, bright; brilliant. Yet the insides of this place was completely empty, full of dust and dirt; as if it was one of those unfinished warehouse buildings you see as you drive by it.
6 Floors. Six empty floors. You would enter the building from the bottom, and see a long staircase that went all the way to the ceiling; yet there would be an opening at every floor. The floors had no walls. Everything was in full view.
I was there, with the music of Ulrich's "Einfeld" in the background somewhere. I was alone in all of the emptiness and dust flying around slowly, like slow tiny fireflies that were being highlighted from a setting sun outside.
I looked over the staircase from the highest floor, and saw all the way down to the bottom of the 6 floors this place had. I had a strange feeling that there was no gravity, and that I could fly down to the bottom if I wanted to. I bent down and swished my hand into the empty air, as if putting my hand through water. It felt as if there was no air - but a elating energy that was asking to be felt. I took a rock and tossed it out there, and it leisurely took its time to slowly fall past all the floors, and land softly on the ground.
I decided to fall into the space, and I floated as well down towards the ground. I felt a calming feeling I had never felt before as I was descending. I was at the bottom. I then walked back up all the flights of this one staircase and went back to the 6th floor where I originally was. For some reason I felt compelled to walk over to this one sheek thing in the building; which was a stereo system, playing the same song I had been hearing since the beginning. There is a part in this "Einfeld" song that someone is singing faintly in the background but it's incredibly hard to decipher. In this dream, I heard the entire lyrics - of his saying something like "I can't stand this waiting anymore; to be by myself and waiting for your beauty; trust in everyone you see - Jesus Christ, give me the strength to see through me" in almost a sancrasant type prayer. I looked behind me and saw my two cats watching this, and listening. I walked over to them and sat down with them in the dust, listening to the rest of the music and hearing the passion whisper throughout the entire building structure.